F1 fever

I have to admit, F1 fever has finally hit me.

When Netflix announced a new season of Drive to Survive starting a few weeks ago I thought I'd check it out. No idea why - just thought I'd give it a go.

And I loved it! One episode in and I was hooked!

I've spent the better part of the past three weeks watching all six seasons and now feel I have a better understanding of F1.

I've also recently joined online dating again and thought my F1 knowledge might be of benefit when chatting to guys.

I've told them I've been watching, but no one really wanted to ask me more than that (quite disappointing as I'm willing to tell anymore who'll listen!).

I can't win!

But I didn't jump on the F1 bandwagon for a date. It's something that's come my way quite organically and unexpectedly. And I'm here for it.

We have a old family friend who's been a rev head for many years and I spent more than an hour-and-a-half chewing his ear off last week learning as much as I can about F1.

Even he was impressed with my knowledge in such a short time!

I best be off - want to see who wins the Australian Grand Prix!

Like the first time

As I stepped outside there was a thickness in the summer air that just felt like love.

I inhaled every single breath.

All of a sudden I had this overwhelming feeling about how nice it would be to be with a boyfriend experiencing this, at-times-balmy, Brisbane night together.

I was grateful to be out of the house with my friend, of course, don't get me wrong.

But with a significant other, it really hits different.

But it made me wonder about the possibilities I was finally feeling so many years after my boyfriend and I broke up.

I lost myself in the break-up and it's taken a really long time to feel anything again.

But I feel I'm there - ready to experience it all again - like the first time - but for the last time.

Waiting

I have this feeling I'm waiting for my life to start.

I'm waiting for a sign ...

I don't believe the life I'm currently living is what I'm supposed to be doing with my time.

Waiting is always the hardest part.

Waiting for the job.

Waiting for the guy.

Waiting for your life to take a turn in the direction it's supposed to be.

Waiting for the weather to clear up.

Waiting for the bus.

Waiting for the end of the day to come.

Waiting for a movie to come out.

Waiting for your friend to arrive.

Waiting for the plane.

Waiting for your next birthday.

Waiting for the sunset.

Waiting for the weekend.

Waiting to feel love again.

Life's too short to wait.

Life starts now. There's no Plan B.

Soulmates

I saw a post on Instagram recently asking if you ever thought what your soulmate was doing right now?

I don't believe in soulmates, but I do often wonder what the guy I'm supposed to be with is doing.

Is he at a friend's BBQ, wishing he has a plus one to accompany him? Did he see a gig (solo) again? Does he look around the room at all the couples, feeling extra single?

Or is he lovin' single life, cherishing these moments he won't get back? Quality time with friends and family - uninterrupted - without outside noise.

Now, I don't stay awake thinking about this, but my mind does often wonder what he's doing and how much longer I have to wait until I meet him.

I've been told I'm impatient (guilty!), however I am 43 years old. Think I have waited long enough!

I've had a few false starts in this area, but there's never been anyone I thought I would be (or wanted to be) with long term.

It's also an exciting time right now - I feel like I am on the cusp of something really great, I just haven't reached the finish line.

Now I know they say it's all about the journey - and that's cool - but it's time I had a co-pilot.

There's also another saying about a lid for every pot. I just need to make sure I'm in the right kitchen.

This independent woman is ready for what happens next - 2024 is going to be the year!

Bunnings

Feeling single hits me at different times. Sure there's the obvious coming home to an empty house, doing the grocery shopping by yourself and of course the dreaded no plus one to a wedding.

But today I was in Bunnings and it hit me.

As I kept loading my trolley with pots, potting mix, soil and more pots it slowly dawned on me how much I was buying and how I really needed someone to help me get it all to the car.

I needed help navigating the trolley up the damn hill to the car, while making sure none of my pots fell off.

You see, I'd bought a few big pots and wondered how much they'd roll around in the boot as I didn't have anyone to put them between their legs.

After considering my options (could I leave the trolley and tail it out of there?!) I asked the lovely young gardening attendant if there was someone who could help me get my trolley to the car? Turns out other staff were too busy so he said he'd help me.

The strapping young guy effortlessly loaded my three bags of soil and potting mix, as well as a few pots into my boot and I thanked him profusely and went on my merry way.

As I was driving home I was thinking how nice it would be to be sitting next to my beau talking about how we'd put the Bunnings haul to use.

Instead, it was me. It's always me.

I had to do the heavy lifting when I got home, but I'm happy to say as I sit on the couch tonight I got three-quarters of my potting done this afternoon and I'm pretty bloody proud of myself. 

I am a strong, independent woman and there's not a lot that stops me in my tracks.

I look forward to a Bunnings visit when I not only share the heavy lifting, but also the other stuff that comes with being in a committed relationship.

Introducing the magic of love

Welcome to my newly re-branded blog about the magic of love - how to find it again and cherish all that comes with it.

People often talk about dressing for the job you want, not the job you have.

I have this same philisophy about finding love again.

Let me give you a few examples. I live alone with my cat Millie and have a huge six-seater, heavy timber dining table (it takes two people to move).

My couch could comfortably sit six people (or eight uncomfortably!), my washing machine is 8.5kg and when I upgraded my fridge about four years ago I literally doubled the litre capacity (I jokingly call it my drinks fridge!).

And again, I live alone.

One might ask why I have such "big" items in my house.

I've always believed I wouldn't be single my entire life so when said things needed replacing, I decided I would get them big enough to fit the life I have always dreamed of having, yet has always been out of my grasp.

I even have beer in the fridge that I don't drink, but want it on hand on the occasion a guy is here and wants one.

I also have tea in my cupboard, yet don't drink the stuff.

I know some people sleep on one side of the bed, getting ready for when they have a partner and won't need to adapt to another in the bed.

I'm not at that level just yet - I love to lie smack bang in the middle.

I will often sit on my huge couch and wonder when I'll be snuggling on it again with a boyfriend watching a series together. But in the meantime, my cat will do just fine.

It's been a minute though.

I broke up with my ex more than five-and-a-half years ago and noone has come close since. Not because I'm holding a torch for him, quite the opposite. I haven't met anyone I've had good banter with, who's made me laugh, wanted to be silly with, watch scary movies with and go on long drives with.

It's these little things I miss most when I don't have a special someone.

It's all about the magic of love.

Mummy's boy

What do you get when you have a box of Roses Cadbury chocolates, a block of dark chocolate and a banana?

Not a second date.

This was my reality recently as I headed to my first date for 2023, and wasn't it memorable.

The guy (28) had suggested a dessert picnic but I (stupidly) assumed that meant he would bring proper food AND dessert.

He asked me to bring a picnic rug so I thought we were set.

But my idea of a romantic nighttime picnic by the water soon disappeared as I see him walking towards me carrying a Woolworths bag with the aforementioned sweat treats (he did keep the banana in the bag - so random!).

My first thought was I haven't eaten dinner! Quickly followed by I totally mis-read this situation.

Let me set the scene. We were meeting at 7pm on a Friday night (soon turned to 7.30pm as he was late leaving the Gold Coast) and where we met in Brisbane's West End was right near a public toilet block on the river.

Under other circumstances (and perhaps him on a date with someone else!) it could have been quite romantic.

The tree we met (and sat) under was lit up with fairy light and was quite beautiful to look at.

However, I was being eaten by mosquitoes and folded my picninc rug at the corner to protect my legs and it was cold. Like way too cold for December (thankfully I'd taken a denim jacket).

But apart from these mishaps I was hoping my gut feeling about this situation, and guy, would not be correct.

I was determined not to let his age influence the outcome of the date (he could have been a mature 28-year-old).

But as we got talking about fairly benign topics I asked who he lived with, to which he replied "family."

I didn't press the issue for a few minutes, then asked what family he lived with?

Turns out he's still at home with mum and dad, and younger sis (but at least she'd moved out of home, then returned). He hasn't left because "don't you know how expensive it is to live out of home??".

He then preceeded to tell me it was $350 to rent a room at Southport on the Gold Coast.

Ahh, yeah mate, been living out of home for 17+ years. It's called adulting.

Then it dawned on me - mumsy would have cooked him dinner before he jumped in the car and headed to Brisbane for a date.

I wouldn't have been surprised if he was driving the family station wagon as well.

I lasted almost two hours on the date which was a fair amount of time, especially considering his solution to me being cold was for us to go back to my place "to keep warm."

No thank you.

He messaged later that night saying he was keen for a second date, but I messaged the following morning saying it was nice to meet him but we were at different stages in our lives and he'll make some girl really happy one day. That just wasn't me. I wished him well.

And got back to swiping on the dating apps.